So, this blogging daily has given me new respect for those with the discipline to bliog daily. Not only because it means committing a certain block of time each day to writing (I used to do that even in my least disciplined times). But because it means concocting something fit for public consumption. Back in the days of the typewriter, I could write all night and clutter my floor with a tumbleweed prairie of throwaways. Yet a night's work might yield nothing worth reading, let alone publishing. But before I press "save" on a blog entry, I have to be able to convince myself that I've said something, however brief, that is worth reading. I imagine that many times I succeed only in self-deception, and not in producing quality writing. Yet, I've made this commitment to getting my blog off life support and expanding my readership.
There are also days on which i might have alot on my mind, yet all of it personal and private. I'm not really sure what has become of "personal and private" in the age of the Internet, blogging, Twitter, Flickr, etc. But my daily economic struggles and my many blunders as I attempt to assure nursing home care for my mom are not really that entertaining. Like today, I organized the last 5 years of bank statements, only to discover I only have about half of them and in no sequential order (I'm surprised I had that many, given that we've changed residence at least once in that period). So now I have to order (and pay for) back copies of the missing statements. Exciting, right? Perhaps, if you add the possibility that a government clerk may disqualify mom from Medicaid based on the way her resources were "spent down." Yummy, right?
So, with that, I leave you. The next everal months promise to be chock full of economic struggles and bureaucratic yumminess. I'm not sure how much I'll be able to stand, let alone translate into bloggishness. Suffice to say, there will be lots of grumbling and cursing. Much of which I will keep to myself.
My mother and her siblings are going through the same struggles as they prepare to place my grandmother in assisted living. First, mom had to take her in and raise her health level; second, the lawyer/sibs are all working together to spend down the money correctly (sounds exhausting, believe me); third, they have to convince her it's time.
It's a delicate process.
Posted by: Kermit | January 21, 2009 at 08:41 PM
This morning I woke up at 3:30 am or so as usual, unable to get back to sleep, and I was thinking pretty much what you just wrote about my own little blog. For what it's worth, I enjoy reading, no matter what you write :)
Posted by: Darcy | January 22, 2009 at 09:23 AM
Actually it's comforting to read of your struggles--mostly to know that I'm not the only one having a difficult time right now. It's crushing to feel like everybody else is having a great time and there I am, not.
Last month I sampled a pretty good poetry anthology--"Good Poems for Hard Times", compiled by Garrison Keillor. Highly recommend.
Posted by: Celeste | January 22, 2009 at 09:44 AM
I just got caught up with all your posts... keep it up, Charlie! Things will get better.
Posted by: Dave | January 22, 2009 at 12:38 PM
Charlie, you might want to look into del.icio.us or Diigo for bookmarking and commenting. I use it on my blog and it's a life safer! It lets me save pages and make comments on pages while I am surfing the net and then those comments are posted to my blog over night. It's a REAL time saver some days. So I pass that along for what it's worth.
Posted by: Elena | January 22, 2009 at 04:31 PM
I hope you get your mom's care taken care of soon and it isn't too difficult. Before my Dad died we experienced just a little bit of what you are going through.
I enjoyed your Obama train pictures.
Posted by: Melissa in TN | January 22, 2009 at 09:06 PM