Lately I've been amazed at the ways in which American society, most often that segment identifying with Conservative values, justifies and rationalizes its own selfish and brutish choices. When you look at it, it's really a kind of art. I mean, if you really dislike someone, there are ways to get your community onboard and really generate some hate energy. For example...
1. Spiritualize the Hate. If there's someone you already dislike, there's no better way to get others to climb aboard the Hate Wagom than to find scriptural evidence that God dislikes that person too. I mean, what better name could you hope to add to any petition than The Almighty Lord & Creator of All Things. (Nevermind the fact that if He created "all things" He likely created that person you dislike.) And it's a great way to distance yourself if things get heated and it looks like you might lose a fight. "Hey, hating you wasn't MY idea," you can say, "it was GOD's." And bada-bing, you're not the hateful prick, God is. See, it all works out.
2. The Law of the Jungle. One easy way to justify uncaring or brutish behavior is by the predatory model of unfettered free markets. Hey, if you're going to be the lion, someone has to be the gazelle, right? Strangely, those whom I know to espouse this view most zealously are far more likely to be the gazelles in this scenario. But it's funny how those who believe in a robust boom-and-bust cycle never picture themselves as its victims. Ask them, and they'll tell you they're far too savvy for that. They've saved their pennies in a big jar, and stuffed their mattresses with dollar bills. Trying to survive a full-scale economic collapse on that kind of plan is like trying to ride out a tsunami on a rubber duck. Good luck, fellas.
3. Drape Yourself in the Flag. If the people you hate happen to be of a different culture, geographic region. or skin tone, Old Glory is your best defense. The "keep America the way it is" argument has been used with some success over the centuries: against the Irish, freed slaves, Eastern Europeans, and Mexicans and Central Americans. You may, however, have to get out your chisel and reword the inscription on the Statue of Liberty to read: "Keep your tired, your hungery, and especially your huddled masses. They're not welcome here." Which is what that statue should have been saying all along. And can we get a second one on the Arizona-Mexico border?
4. Nine Eleven. If anyone you dislike can in ANY way be considered a potential terror threat, use it. Because silly laws like habeas corpus, right to counsel, right not to be tortured, etc. do NOT apply to really scary criminals like terrorists. It doesn't matter if the person you dislike really IS a terrorist or has ties to terrorists or really has anything whatever to do with terrorism. Just that they MIGHT in a certain light seem a little terroristy is good eniough.
How you manage to take something so depressing and make me laugh about it is a mystery wrapped in a miracle covered in amazing. You have a gift.
Posted by: Darcy | September 26, 2011 at 09:13 PM