It ain't all pizzas and cream

Goodbye, Thank you, 2011

Goodbye, Twenty-eleven

Goodbye false hope

Goodbye, calls from the emergency room

Goodbye to my monther-in-law's 60-day hospital stay

Gooodbye to her pneumonia

Goodbye to her foreclosure and eviction

Goodbye to bankruptcy

Goodbye, earthquakes

Goodbye Ruby, killed in a crash

Goodbye, wooden horses

Goodbye, paper roses

 Goodbye. 

 

§    §    §

 

Thank you, Twenty-Eleven

Thank you for my health

Thank you for my family

Thank you for rivers of verse running thru me

Thank you to my editor & publisher

Thank you friends (old and new)

Thank you.

And my best wishes to you all, my readers, for health, strength, and luck in the new year.

 

Prophesy (a poem sequence)

The pickers have come in from the fields. 
The river, they said, is bubbling 
with cow’s blood. They hold up their hands 
to show the clotted tears crying in the fields
of their palms. By morning, their shacks 
will be empty, their doors wide as screams,
their old cars kicking red mud from their tires.

§   §   §   §

The river churns high and muddy, 
the ghosts of cars and oil drums 
hurtling downstream in the searchlights. 

Toads and moles crawl up the embankment 
in waves. Like men unaware 
they've been cut in two, they twist
and gasp, grabbing at your arms.

Sand bags or sand castles, 
it matters little. The radio says 
more rain's on the way. The road
will wash out by dawn. Pack your things, 
head to high ground.

 §   §   §   §

There's a doll among the splinters
and a pump that bleeds 

only rust. The shutters on the church
have been pulled tight as a noose 

around the Holy Ghost. Tree limbs
lay about like spent cigars 

and the filling station's closed. Some 
have vowed to return, but who

will charm the snakes from the silos
or burn the rats from the corn?

 

Fight the Voices

Today I watched a man
try to swat the flies in his head--
those voices too small to separate

Yet too large to ignore. The static
between radio stations, the pop 
of bacon grease in the pan.

He spun and hollered, cursed
and cajoled--a drunken maestro
swarmed by unruly notes.

I didn't know him
but I recognized him.

 

So much for that.

This week has been a learning experience. The main thing I have learned is that I need stimulants. Apologies to those who'v e been rooting for me, and thank you for your support, but perhaps the all-or-nothing sobriety model is not appropriate to the Red Bull situation.

So, while I have not had a Red Bull, I am searching for alternatives. Today I tried "Monster: Absolute Zero." I imagine that the flavor to be based on antifreeze and horse piss. Having tried neither, I can only assume. I reviewed a few web sites that rate energy drinks. Among the high scorers was "Monster: Rehab." Not quite as sugary as others but with a good taste and respectable kick. So I'm gonna give it a try. It's called "Rehab" afterall. 

Another good option, without adding any more money to Starbucks' war chest, is Seattle's Best Iced Coffee Vanilla Latté. As many of my friends have said: What the hell's wrong with having coffee?




Will report my findings over the next few days. 

 

Well it's been a week.

I've been sleepwalking thru my life since quitting Red Bull. Today i actually fell asleep sitting upright in my chair while online. I awoke an hour later. Tomorrow is a busy day: work, drop off work with client, doctor's appt.  i8've heard good things about "Monster Rehab." May have to cave and buy a can.

Day 5 sans Red Bull

Was tired ALL DAY yesterday. Also missed afternoon coffee so, other than Bai drink, was caffeine-free. On the bright side, I seem to have avoided the caffeine-withdrawal headache. But I'm not sure how long I can afford to walk thru my days like a zombie.

DAY 4 sans Red Bull

The bear is grumpy.

We did manage to get out to the mall for our annual family portrait with Santa. Unfortunately the Santa featured in our last five Xmas porraits was too ill this year to make the trek from Texas (seems he usually gets paid a boatload of cash to hole up in a hotel for a month and work 10 hours a day as a Department Store Santa). But he's getting on in years (as are most Santas who sport real white beards) and he wasn't up to spending a month away from home. The substitute Santa was pretty good tho: white beard [check!], glasses [check!], pink cheeks [check!], jolly chuckle [check!].  There was even a Mrs. Claus. The photo came out well, i.e., Tori actually smiled and you can't see my missing teeth. 

For all the trouble that quitting Red Bull is causing, I feel I should be losing weight or getting taller or something. Maybe I'll start putting aside $8 per day, the amount I was spending on Red Bull, and at the end of the month treat myself to something. Like the electric bill.